quite a day

Mom is back at the hospital. Not sure if she will be in for the night, or a couple of days but she was sick to her stomach a number of times last night and this morning and ended up coming back to London tonight...it has been quite an emotional roller coaster and I am having a tough time holding it together. On the outside I am doing okay but inside I sometimes feel like I might explode. I have moments of vulnerability but for the most part I am trying to carry on. I can tell it is affecting abbi though. She has been more cranky.

can't believe how warm, humid, it was today. I am enjoying it but it means we will likely have a late start to winter and a long winter again.

worried about mom...we all have an appointment with the specialist tomorrow to find out the news from the surgery. We aren't expecting great news...hopefully it isn't too much of a blow though...i love my mom and want her to be around for a while yet. God - what is your plan? I try to turn myself over to you and let go but it is soooo hard. I need your guidance.